Wednesday 1 June 2011

why a stay at home?

being a stay at home is not so much a choice....its just something that has become my life right now...

sometimes i even feel like maybe i should take on a job.... but 10 to 7 i cant do no more!!

just the idea of having to get up at a certain time reach an office sign in the attendance sit in front of a computer (hey its very very different from sitting in my shorts with my legs up on my coffee table and having dexter on and working on the laptop) trying to please an inconsistent boss (there is no other kind)....

I have had all kinds of jobs all my life.... interior designing with an architect was my first... and it was actually fun... i was the youngest in the office and so got away with much! coming in late...not having too much responsibility.... good fun!! but my too good for anything quality came out and i decided in hardly two years of experience to branch out on my own.... not a good idea in retrospect!

so i did one house on my own..... disaster....! not the house they house was great.... but the whole financial and management part of it... scarred me for life....

till my next job i learnt Spanish went for salsa classes..... then when i couldn't stay at home anymore (and i had spent everything i had earned!!) it was time for job number two....

A call center.... i bet you're thinking from interior designer to call center....???? whaaaat??!!!
i was uninspired to join another architect.... but the best thing that came out of this job was.... a husband... no wait.... the best husband! Even though we married some five years later.... i love our story! (another time!)

so then we both quit.... so so boring that job was.... and really tiring...

next came an audition for a film (which i got thru) for some friends. while waiting for the shooting to start... i planned the same friends' wedding. Now that was MY moment!!!

it was like those moments in films where suddenly everything is brighter and birds are flying in the clear blue sky....and everything is just perfect! i loved everything about weddings... the creating of the decor... (yup i handmade most of the decor.... even then i was the DIY girl!!!) the meeting and handling of guests feeling like family to them... being the problem solver.... superb... what a feeling it is to make a couples most important day so so special!

did one more friends wedding after that one... and it was even prettier even more "me"!!! i felt like this was it this is what i wanted to do forever!

then came the film shooting... i put weddings on a back burner... and fully enjoyed this new "stardom"!!! ha ha... no but it really was fun.... different... but fun.

after the shoot i was a bit lost.... for some reason i didn't go back to weddings...i tried working with my mum she's an artist so i tried to make products with her art.... we did exhibitions and things... but for some reason... ah no... for the very clear reason of both of us being terrible at marketing... we didn't really manage to take it out there like we wanted to...

so  instead i took up a job of film writing.... I can't explain why... but i did. It was ok... felt more like a little secretary who was taking notes for the writers... because i couldn't add to the story... I also handled the accounts of my boss... funny jobs!!! but i learnt to keep files... which has come in handy today!

during my writing stint i found another opportunity to get into weddings so i took it.... but it turned out to be a sham!! The guy who hired me actually wanted and interior designer for his office at a very low rate... so he showed me dreams of being the wedding planner in his event company but "Could you also help me with our new office?"!!

Well that stint got over pretty fast... but the wedding bug had settled into my head.
Also by this time husband and i were engaged to get married in a year... so i decided to really put myself out there in the field of weddings... I applied for a job!

And got one in a very interesting company..... worked there for around 5 months...then i got badly ill and had to leave. But it was a really great experience...i got to help design and manage a wedding in the royal palaces in udaipur.... got to design a casual wedding by the beach in Kashid near alibaug... i wish i could have actually done that wedding but i had already quit and it was very close to my own wedding!

Post this job... i started planning my own wedding... what a job that was!!! i put my heart and soul it in... and used my beautiful artist mother fully!!! she hand painted my wedding cards... my sangeet backdrop.... the gifts we gave every guest.... she did everything!!! Will put up my wedding soon!

now happily married.... i had to do something else... the opportunity of another film came about.... so i took it.... i mean a 2 month vacation in London fully paid.... why would i refuse!!! This was my biggest experience in life... and i grew emotionally and physically!!! (i also grew more confused!!!)

back from London and husband and decided to work together... good idea... but bad decisions!!! also the end as i know it of my creativity.... i was so overshadowed by his flow of creativity... that mine went into hiding... and its still there!!!

SO

as you can see job after job after job.... I can easily say i have done it all!!! so now you can see why i cant get myself to take on another JOB!

but i must do something.... something i must do.... with myself with my life.... stay at home can only stay at home so much!!! 

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