Wedding Tips Tuesdays- Adding to your family!!!!

Ok so this is not exactly a wedding tip.... but boy will it be useful post your wedding!!!!!

So for most people who don't know.... 2 years is like the honeymoon period before you get to the "So when's the good news?"  period of a marriage!!

after all two years should be enough to get to know the person you have your babies with, to understand the mood swings of your life partner, to (in most cases) fall in love with your spouse..... well.....two years go by pretty damn fast!!!!

yes yes for all those calculating i'm in 2 years and 10 months of my marriage.... and yes its no more subtle hints but full blown "where the hell are the grand children!!!!!!"

Most of my friends are married and are now either pregnant or with babies ranging from just born to a year.... and I've been making the rounds to meet with them (hubby in tow most of the times) and its been very interesting to see all of them and their babies....and very educational! I have picked up many many pointers which I will share with you!

Having a baby is a big deal.... its a part of your hubby and you.... its something that is proof of your love for each other.... (for me at least!!!) and its such a big responsibility.... a little human that depends on you for everything.....

I've met girls who have been married for a year or two to girls who have been married for a few months and they have babies....from well planned to accidental surprise package...And what has struck me as most important is that both of you'll just have to be ready for the baby... you'll both should want one as much as the other.... or well at least should be ready in the case of the guys!!

and plan for the baby... understand your financials, understand what kind of family support you'll have and will need.... understand that life will change.... be ready completely for the change.

But more than anything.... build your stamina!!!!! I'm telling you you will thank me for this point....

I've been playing with my little nephew every alternate day for the last few days and the reason I don't meet him in between is because I'm nursing massive body aches!!! The first day my shoulders ached from carrying him around the next my waist because I decided to save my shoulders and carry him on my waist.... Oh My God!!!!!

And if not from the carrying around just from the sheer entertaining you'll be exhausted.... they have the energy of I don't know what.... But in my house we all took turns in making sure he laughed all thru the day!!!

So before you even decide to have a baby... spend a year building up your stamina... I mean like do some hardcore training.... like for a marathon or climbing mountains or something!!!

And watch your diet from a year before as well.... One of my friends (very smart girl) lost a lot of weight just before she got pregnant but in a healthy way... so when she put on it really didn't show all that much.... and now loosing it seems to be easier for her.... so that is another really smart pointer.

Meditation seemed to really help another friend of mine...She was into it and yoga from before but she said that she mediated and did her yoga thru her pregnancy and it helped her a lot. The yoga for her body of course and the meditation just kept her in a very positive space.... being positive and happy i feel is very very important because that's just how your baby is going to be you know...

Being happy has a lot to do with your husband.... so sit him down and talk talk talk.... discuss everything with him involve him in everything.... divide all the work post the baby so not only is he a part of his baby's life from day one but you have all the help and support you're going to need.

So there you have it... once the questions start popping up check this list:

1. Are you both ready mentally to take on this big step in life?
2. Are your financials in order? All steady jobs and business intact and all?
3. How much family support do you have or need?
4. Are you physically strong?
5. Are you positive and happy? both of you?
6. Have you'll discussed everything you need to discuss with each other?

Of course the most important thing...Spend the years before the baby having lots of fun... go on mad spontaneous vacations... party lots... spend nights talking to each other and getting to know each other.... the life of a newly married couple is very very important for your kids.... because its the bond you'll form then that will determine how you'll deal with things that come later in life.... So thoroughly enjoy the "couple-dome" but not with the thought of the baby is going to tie us down or our lives are going to be over once we have kids.... just in a positive way enjoy the life!

Well all of this is from a very in experienced perspective.... but like i said I'm spending a lot of time with the nephew as part of my training so these are all the pointers I have come to understand....!!!!!

yes yes... I'm ready (kinda, sorta .... ummm... maybe!!!) .... just readying the boy now!!!

Incase you'll were wondering!!!

So here is my inspiration for this post!

That's him!!!

He's my little doll!!!

look at those beautiful eyes!!!

That's my mum and him doing the boing boing!!!!

                                          

That's our screaming match.... what a fun!!!

Now how cute is that.... just being with him makes me want to have one!!!

Wedding Outfits!

This was my only so called "Designer" outfit!!!! Its a Ritu Kumar and holds a very special place in my heart....

All thru my wedding shopping i felt like i needed to have at least one designer outfit namely a Sabyasachi!!! but of course because of my budgeting that was way out of my league!! Lots of friends spoke of Ritu Kumar as being the ideal bridal designer but I hadn't paid much attention.... till that one fateful day in a delhi mall (forget which one... one the outskirts of the city.... its super huge.... damn!!!)

I was completing my western outfit part of my trousseau when i saw this Ritu Kumar store on sale!!! SALE!!! now i just had to go in there.....

almost immediately i saw this piece.... and fell in love!!! and then the price tag and i was more in love!!!! my cousin who i was with convinced me that to get a Ritu Kumar (its funny how i have to type her whole name each time!!!) at that price was a steal but still i had to ask my mum..... but she didn't answer right then.... so we had to leave the mall....

I was leaving for Jaipur the next morning and i just couldn't leave without that outfit.... So when i finally got thru to my mum and got permission.... i rushed my cousin and hubby to be all the way back to the god forsaken mall almost an hour and a half away.... we got there like half hour before closing time and luckily it was right there waiting for me!!!

A few alterations and they couriered it to Bombay for me.... ahhhhh sooooo pretty!!!

Frankly i looked my prettiest that day and not just the outfit but the make up.... one of my most magical friends did it for me and she just made me glow!!! yeah i think the happiness of marrying that guy also had something to do with it!!!!

So here's the dress and me at my emotional- est!!!

Something about finally getting married can make you super emotional......

I loved every minute of it....!!

All the Punjabi details and the jewellery just brought out the best in the outfit!

Everything about it is so bridal don't you think?

The embroidery and intricate details looked stunning....

Every lace every piece of brocade and gold thread work.... the colors.... i love!!

I especially loved the way the dupatta fell... so soft and gentle and lovely!!!

hmmmmmmm I could get married all over again just to get back into that outfit!!!

Wedding Outfits!

So one of my most favorite persons is getting married in two months.... and i'm soooooo excited!!! buying new clothes, dance practice for the sangeet, the wedding decor the invites..... all of it so fun!!!!

Of course nothing like the shopping!!!! (though yes decor is more me... but new clothes.... c'mon....!!!!!!)

I've been on the net for days trying to find the current colors and styles.... now to go out into the market and see it for real.... i have so many options..... really want to check out a masaba for the cocktail and aishwarya for a beautiful saree for the baraat....

The wedding is in delhi and i'm sure even all the delhi-iets will agree that you really gotta dress it up there! The last wedding i attended there i was looked up and down by every girl!!! I'm sure they knew exactly what shoes i had on and whether my jewelry really matched my outfit!!!!

So while I'm on my search.... here's a little reminiscing on my wedding clothes!!!

Lets start with my absolutely favorite outfit.... the cocktail lehenga....!!!!

yes I'm a full on nautunki!!!!!

this was my ek do teen dance!!!!! someday one day i may put up the video!!!!!

so that's the choli.....

this is my favorite part of the outfit.... see the image on the left without the heavy dupatta can also be worn with a simpler dupatta to make it less dressy.....and with the heavy dupatta... well that's just pure drama!!!!!

see what i mean.... every layer is stunning!!!!

this was really my most favorite outfit!!!!

don't you just love the details!!!!!

The next outfit in the next post!!!!!!!

Finding Mr Right!

The most important part of a marriage is finding the right person..!!

We spend all our lives all our energies in just that... Mr Perfect! really? is there really someone like that that exists?

What is a perfect guy? Smart, Rich, Handsome? A guy that can make you laugh, gets you flowers everyday? A guy that can kisses you in front of your friends and hugs you till you fall asleep?

Thats not a real guy... thats a character out of a fantastic romantic chick flick....

A really perfect guy will expect you to laugh at yourself and to enjoy cheesy burgers and fries.... he'll fight with you and yeah well he'll still hug you till you fall asleep!!!!!

But really someone explain to me what is with girls (and guys) making up these lists of what they want in their companions for life? These out of proportion expectation they have of their to be's? Take a good long look at yourself before you sit down to make those lists.... what is it about you that your guy likes and dislikes... what are the things in you that he overlooks just because?

If you need to make a list of all the things that work for you in the relationship as opposed to all the things that don't then that right there is the biggest reason you shouldn't be with them.

If you really like the guy.... you wont need to convince yourself... if you are then you're settling.... which also somewhere somehow sometimes is ok. Its fine to sit back and say that "hey these things i can deal with and these things I can't but they aren't so bad that i absolutely can't deal with them" and then stick with it... stick with him.... either ways love marriage, arranged marriage, crazy love or practical decision... whatever the route... the end result is to be together... to stay together.... to be able to say that I am here for good.... and to actually do that....

Divorce has become such an easy easy thing to do... it takes just one sign on a paper and you're done... earlier it used to be such a taboo.... if a couple even went so far as to consider it both their parents would sit them down and ask them to give it another shot.... but today.... who has the time... the patience?

and what is a good marriage if not full of patience.... and giving of time to each other?

after a few years there may not be that crazy passionate "love" but if you foundation your relationship with friendship and respect it'll take you much further.... If you can have fun and laugh together and sit in silence and be ok with it.... you're in a good space.... look for that the next time you're looking for love....

I always tell my friends "If you have more reasons to be with him than not then just be with him!!!!"

I love this line i read somewhere once" Love isn't about finding a Mr Right.... its about finding someone imperfect and loving him perfectly!!!" And i really think thats true!

Just Being You.....

Some days the normal and the ordinary just seem so suffocating.... you look around and can't help but wish for something else.....

anything else.... not just another life, another home sometimes a whole other world....

somewhere where its just the way you want it... where its just you and your thoughts or no thoughts... where you can come and go as you please... sing or dance.... eat or sleep.... where with every step you take everything around you changes to suit you mood.... from fiery red skies to calm star studded deep purple ones.... from sand under you feet to forests and trees with flowers falling onto your hair....  from wild horses and wolves to majestic lions and tigers to curling up against an elephant trunk....where i'd have books for company and music all the time.... from running so fast i could fly.... from sleeping on a bed of flowers to a boat in the middle of the ocean...being alone being surrounded.... just so long as you get to be you.....

some days i can live in my head forever....... in my other world......

To walk around my other world... go here!